(Written 03/26/14 for Stand-Up Class)
The universe has it in for me. I am not the prettiest looking of a person, and usually in my group of friends I am the one usually everyone hates to be around. Eventually every woman in my life associates me with something horrendous that happened in their life before I ever entered their life.
I walk into a McDonald’s and a guy, who is sitting alone-he says “Hey your PHAT, man!” The only way I know how to respond without coming off hostile is “I know! WOOT WOOT!”
I get up to the counter to order my usual 3 fish sandwiches,2 chickens and a mint shake some kid walks over to me and asks”are you gay?” I am not even caring whether I come off homophobic or hetrophobic…I am the one wearing a suit with a skirt and high heels, so I guess I…
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